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Had church today, and then something was brought up very suddenly in my mind.

You know it's like, everyone likes to look good right? Who doesn't? Even tomboys like to look good. People have this interpretation of liking to look good as always going to check yourself in the mirror, freaking out over what to wear, etc. But seriously, it's not. Liking to look good simply means you do not want to go out looking like a freak. If someone doesn't like to look good, I'm sure that person wouldn't mind strolling around Orchard Road in the ugliest, holey Pjs with hair like a haystack. -.-

Well, yeah. 'Cause it's like, I'm very concerned about my exterior and what people think about me. Well, more concerned than the average people are. For me it's not really easy to say things like, "Let her/him think whatever they want". And sometimes I feel like I care too much about it, more than I should. I get caught up in all the materialistic things.

Really, I mean like I even catch myself trying to please people more than I'm trying to please God. It's like, even when I'm writing this post, it's really very difficult for me to write out everything I'm thinking and try not to give a big fat damn about what others will think of this "really cheesy post".

I seriously don't want to turn out like someone I know. It's so easy to get trapped in this whole web of materialistic stuff. A lot of times I feel like I'm such a bitch. Even if I'm not one now, I'm so afraid I'll turn into a bitch without even knowing it. And like, I find myself becoming ruder to my mum.

It's very sad, really. I'm frightened I'll turn into some real rebelious kid perhaps without my own notice.

I'm sorry if I've been bitchy to anyone, or pissed anyone off ))):